-Bobby Cox planning to stab umpire in celebration of breaking the all time ejections record.
-Dirk Nowitzki to put MVP trophy between his balls and heart on the shelf.
-Curt Schilling hangs self in order to get more attention in between starts.
-Yankees hope banning booze in clubhouse will help headcases Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera stay focused on the field.
-Josh Hamilton demands no trade clause in his contract, but only to the Yankees.
-Jaguars devastated to learn Byron Leftwich is healthy, able to play.
-Isiah Thomas given contract extension for coaching his nephew's PAL team to .500 record.
-John Amaechi would like you to know he's gay. Also, did he mention he's gay?
-Sebastian Telfair found in Central Park burning copies of "Through the Fire" for warmth.
-Mariners still confident signing Jeff Weaver was a good move.
-Pacman Jones suspension repealed under the condition that he "tries really hard this time."
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3 comments:
*COUGH* *COUGH* My balls arent *COUGH* on the shelf *COUGH* they are *COUGH* *COUGH* in my throat *COUGH* I can't *COUGH* BREATHE!! *COUGH* *COUGH*
i didn't need to know that, dirk.
<3, kristen.
Anyone that watched the series against GS already knew that
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