David Beckham arrived in the US on Friday, and everything changed. Oh? It didn't? You didn't feel the very planet shake when his foot first touched American soil? Well maybe not yet, but here are what may happen in the coming weeks:
- Beck's first MLS game, July 21st on ESPN, breaks ratings records. Watched by nearly 40 million households, ESPN decides to take advantage of his popularity. ESPN Classic changes to Beckham Classic. Baseball Tonight is now Soccer Tonight, and for some reason John Kruk is still an analyst. Also, a reality show is created documenting David Beckham's journey's through the local Pathmark, and his struggle in selecting the perfect toilet tissue.
- David Beckham trips over his Personal Cameraman when jogging on to the field for the first time. Becks breaks his leg, tears and ACL, and is out indefinitely. After being carried out on a stretcher, the 40,000 fans that attended the game all walk out of the stadium and the match is played with only two fans remaing, the guy who sells hot dogs, and a 14 year old girl who mistakenly thought all the spice girls would show up.
- Much like when Reggie Jackson came to New York, a candy is made for David Beckham. Hershey comes out with a bag of chocolate covered peanuts with chocolate sprinkles. The package of candy's is called Beckham's Sack. Young women eat-up the candy, despite it tasting like total balls.
Of course, the mostly likely thing that will happen after Beck's arrival:
- Absolutely nothing.
No comments:
Post a Comment