Sunday, January 24, 2010

Playoff Pool - Championship Weekend!

1. Bambrick 437
QB: Drew Brees 23, Payton Manning 32
RB: Adrian Peterson 32, Reggie Bush 10
WR: Marques Colston 4, Jerricho Cotchery 15, Percy Harvin 8
TE: Dustin Keller 18
K: Jay Feely 3

2. Little Curry 404
QB:drew brees 23, peyton manning 32
RB:shonn greene 4,reggie bush 10
WR: Reggie wayne 8, percy harvin 8, lance moore 1
TE: dalas clark 13
K:ryan longwel 4

3. Holohan 379
QB: Mark Sanchez 20, Drew Breesus 23
RB: Shonn Greene 4, Adrian Peterson 32
WR: Jericho Cotchery 15, Sydney Rice 14, Marques Colston 4
TE: Visanthe Shiancock 12
K: Jay Feely 3

4. Curry 367
You see, I've been saving all my good players for this week.
QB 1: Peyton Manning 32
QB 2: Drew Brees 23
WR 1: Percy Harvin 8
WR 2: Sidney Rice 14
WR 3: Devery Henderson 13
RB 1: Adrian Peterson 32
RB 2: Reggie Bush 10
TE: Dallas Clark 13
K: Jay Feely 3

5. Canova 357
“To all the Jet fans who ‘strategically’ took the Sanchize last week… thinking your team would lose… you disgust me!”
QB 1 – THE Mark Sanchize 20
QB 2 – Brett Favre 12
WR 1 –Jerricho Cotchery 15
WR 2 – Sidney Rice 14
WR 3 – Bernard Berrian 17
RB 1 – The playoffs leading rusher -- Shonn Greene 4
RB 2 – Superstar Reggie Bush 10
TE 1 – Dallas Clark 13
K 1 – Garrett Hartley 7

Still got Drew and Peyton!!! Someone’s smelling week 4 comeback!!!!

6. Ethan 346
"Fuck all y'all."
QB
1) Peyton Manning 32 (IND)
2) Brad Smith 3 (NYJ) (Oooooooooh, interesting. what is he thinking?)
RB
1) Adrian Peterson 32 (MIN)
2)Joseph Addai 8 (IND)
WR
1) Sidney Rice 14 (MIN)
2) Braylon Edwards 18 (NYJ)
3) Percy Harvin 8 (MIN)
TE
1) Jeremy Shockey 1 (NO)
K
1) Ryan Longwell 4 (MIN)

7. Steve: 330
QB: Sanchez 20
RB: Reggie Bush 10, Shonn Greene 4
WR: Sydney Rice 14, Bernard Berrian 17, Jerrico Cotchery 15
TE: Visanthe Shiancoe 12
K: Ryan Longwell 4

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Playoff Pool - Divisional Weekend!

Welcome back for another exciting round of fantasy playoff football!

As always, players are listed by penile girth in decreasing order, most girthy to least girthy.

1. Little Curry, 301
QB: Philip Rivers 17, Kurt Warner 4
RB: Adrian Peterson 9, Marion Barber 1
WR: Sydney Rice 38, Marques Colston 20, Vincent Jackson 18
TE: Jason Witten 19
K: Nate "The Nate" Kaeding -1

2. Bambrick, 292
QB: Brett Favre 33 (MIN), Mark Sanchez 8 (NYJ) Chosen for strategic reasons... not because it is funny.
RB: Shonn Greene 20 (NYJ), Beanie Wells 6 (ARI) Yes, I just picked two rookie RBs.
WR: Miles Austin 8 (DAL), Pierre Garcon 8 (IND), Sidney Rice 38 (MIN)
TE: Visanthe Shiancoe 8 (MIN) The man has a large penis.
K: Nate Kaeding -1 (SD)

3. Holohan, 252
QB: Kurt Warner 4, Brett Favre 33. These fuckers are old!
RB: Darren Sproles 9, Thomas "It's not unusual!" Jones 4
WR: Larry Fitzgerald 13, Percy Harvin 3, Vincent Jackson 18
TE: Antonio Gates 17
K: Neil Rackers 1

4. Canova, 245
QB 1 – Philip ‘the homo sissy’ Rivers 17
QB 2 – Kurt Warner 4
WR 1 – Wayne 20
WR 2 - Colston 20
WR 3 – Breaston 9
RB 1 – AP 9
RB 2 – Felix 12
TE 1 – Tony Gates 17
K 1 – John Barney 0

5. Steve, 234
QB: Drew Brees 27, Brett Favre 33
RB: Ray Rice 19, Adrian Peterson 9
WR: Marques Colston 20, Percy Harvin 3, Devery Henderson 18
TE: Dallas Clark 12
K: Nate Kaeding -1

6. Ethan, 226
As a great man once said "I don't have no trouble with you fuckin' me. But I got a little problem with you not fuckin' me"
QB: Kurt Warner 4 (ARZ); Brett Favre 33 (MIN) (A classic rematch of Super Bowl XII I think)
RB: Shaun "Rolling in the" Green 20 (NYJ); Beanie "My baby fell into a" Wells 6 (ARZ)
WR: Miles "Steve" Austin 8 (DAL); Larry "Not Actually Irish" Fitzgerald 13 (ARZ); Jericho Cotchery 5 (NYJ)
TE: Dustin Keller 10 (NYJ)
K: Neil "Huge" Rackers 1 (ARZ)

7. Curry, 219
QB 1: Mark Sanchez 8
QB 2: Tony Romo -1 (outstanding choice!!!)
WR 1: Derrick Mason 10
WR 2: Steve Breaston 9
WR 3: Miles Austin 8
RB 1: Shonn Greene 20
RB 2: Beanie Wells 6
TE: Antonio Gates 17
K: Nate Kaeding -1

Love,
Future Champion

Friday, January 8, 2010

Playoff Victories for the Glorification of Jets Nation!!! - Wildcard Weekend!

Ethan
QB: Aaron "Mr" Rodgers (43) (GB); Tony "No Homo" Romo (21 POINTS) (DAL)
RB: Ray "Instant" Rice (26 POINTS) (BAL); Thomas "Outta My Way" Jones (9 POINTS) (NYJ)
WR: Desean Jackson (10 POINTS) (PHL); Derrek Mason (1) (BAL); Donald "Pile" Driver (6) (BAL)
TE: Brent Celek (8 POINTS) (PHI)
K: David "40" Akers "and a Mule" (2 POINTS) (PHL)
Hey thanks for the shitty nicknames, Berman!
Total: 126

Holohan
QB: Donovan McNabb (12 POINTS), Aaron Rodgers (43)
RB: Cedric Benson (27 POINTS), Ray Rice (26 POINTS)
WR: Julian Edelman (22), Desean Jackson (10 POINTS), Derrick Mason (1)
TE: Brent Celek (8 POINTS)
K: Stephen Gostkowski (1)
This guy really seems to know what he's doing, baby!
Total: 150

Little Curry
QB: aaron rodgers (43), donovan mcnabb (12 POINTS), RB: thomas jones (9 POINTS), ray rice (26),
WR: jeremy maclin (27 POINTS), larry fitzgerald (24), miles austin (21 POINTS), TE: brent celek (8 POINTS),
K:jay feely (6 POINTS)
He's the littlest curry there is, folks!
Total: 176

Normal Sized Curry
Message: "Here you go fuckface, prepare to be fucked... in the face."
QB 1 ? Kurt Warner (43)
QB 2 ? Joe Flacco (1)
WR 1 ? Larry Fitzgerald (24)
WR 2 ? Julian Edelman (22)
WR 3 ? DeSean Jackson (10 POINTS)
RB 1 ? Ray Rice (26)
RB 2 ? Thomas Jones (9 POINTS)
TE ? Jason Witten (6 POINTS)
K ? David Akers (2 POINTS)
This gent really doesn't seem to be sure of his picks! Fear and loathing for sure!
Total: 143

Bambrick
QB: Kurt Warner (43), 1999 Rams
QB: Donovan McNabb (12 POINTS), Eagles
RB: Thomas Jones (9 POINTS), Rex Ryan's favorites
RB: Ray Rice (26), Rutgers
WR: Larry Fitzgerald, Kurt Warner's team (24)
WR: Julian Edelman (22), Wes Welker wannabe
WR: DeSean Jackson (10 POINTS), team from the same piece of shit city as the Phillies
TE: Brent Celek (8 POINTS), same team as McNabb and Jackson, so I really hope they don't win
K: Mason Crosby (8), Packers
Let's hope for a puke free game from McNabb!
Total: 164

Steve
QB: Aaron Rodgers (43), Donovan McNabb (12 POINTS)
WR: Donald Driver (6), Desean Jackson (10 POINTS), Derrick Mason (1)
RB: Brian Westbrook (3 POINTS), Ryan Grant (9)
TE: Brent Celek (8 POINTS)
K: David Akers (2)
Total: 94

Canova
QB:Anthony Romo (21 POINTS), Donovan McNabb (12 POINTS)
WR: DeSean Jackson (10 POINTS), Miles Austin (21 POINTS), Larry Fitzgerald (24)
RB: Ray Rice (26), Tommy Jones (9 POINTS)
TE: Jason Witten (6 POINTS)
K: Jay Feely (6 POINTS)
Total: 135

Canova and Normal Sized Curry's picks are coming at us all the way from Boston, baby!